For those that like me, don’t make new year’s resolutions, but who instead choose to just focus on making life better in 2008, you might enjoy the following. I received this by email from someone who knows me well.

Rules for 2008

Make realistic goals for yourself, write them down, pray about them and try to achieve them!

Go through your cell phone, caller id, calendar, and email addresses and discard all the people and events that mean you no good or don’t benefit your life!

Stop making excuses about your life and make changes!

If you are involved w/ a person, job, or circumstance that is doing more harm than good, do yourself a favor – LET IT GO!

Stop being someone’s mistress; especially if you are aware that you are!!!!

If you are between the ages of 22-35 please start listening to more than Hip-Hop!

Take care of your kids and devote a weekend or two when you spend “quality” time with them. Who cares if you miss out on a “mix”! You can party anytime!

Get your debt in order! Eventually you’ll want a nice home and car in your name!

Stop spreading senseless rumors and try to get your own life in order!

Listen more! Talk Less!

Give without worrying about it!

Tell him (or her) no for once!


new year’s resolve

new-year.jpgI have decided to do away with new year’s resolutions for good. Whats the point of them? I never stick to them. They always sound good when I vocalize them, but two weeks after the new year has begun, I find yourself still immersed in old habits. Fuq that. I’m over it. What  I WILL focus on is my resolve for the new year. How I will take steps to ensure that I see growth in the right areas; to make sure that I’m not repeating the same mistakes and not achieving any of the goals that I have set for myself. 2007 was one of those transition years for me- I couldn’t truly appreciate that until just yesterday. One of the major things that I’ve learned for 2007 is that you can’t achieve your goals without knowing your limitations. I never appreciated that before. At first it was just a matter of me creating these lofty goals, and not factoring in my own ..erra.. tendencies toward triflingness. So for 2008, I’m focusing on those tendencies that might prevent me from seeing my goals through to fruition. ( You know laziness, procrastination, being unorganized, unfocused..the list truly goes on).  I just feel good about the possibilities- the thought that new options, experiences and lessons are in store excites me.  The thought that I don’t have to be limited by other folks’ messiness, by other folks’ beliefs, by other folks’ choices excites me. Being blessed to sit here at the cusp of a new year excites me. Being grateful enough to know that though life is hard sometimes- my life is truly good and I have so much to be thankful for. In learning to be more gracious, I know that I do need to learn not to get sucked up into negativity as much as I have in the past. I allowed myself to wallow in it in 2007 and allowed myself to lose focus on the important things because of it. No more of that for me. So for anyone who visits with their own messy  negative agendas, there really won’t be much to go back and report. My apologies in advance. All that you will find here is more of ME than ever before. That way you can see who I am for yourself rather than basing your visits on what others have told you. That way you won’t waste your time by visiting me to find out someone else’s wherabouts. Messy. No messiness in 2008. Period.
I welcome the new year. I welcome the new possibilities. I welcome the blessings that God has in store for me as well as the lessons that He has designed for the new year. I welcome it all.
Happy New Year and good luck in strengthening your resolve in 2008!!



when i was younger, my cousins and I used to sing this song at my grandfather’s church called “be grateful”.  The words basically affirmed that God doesn’t promise to give us “happy” moments all the time. We won’t always have sunshine, or laughter in our lives. The concept of life itself pretty much guarantees a little pain and sorrow once in a while. Learning to be grateful first of all for the gift of life, and then being appreciative of the things that we have been given is the prescription for getting through the tough times. Of course back when we sang the song, it was pretty much because we knew we’d HAVE to sing something and that just happened to be one of the in our little group’s repertoire. At the wizened old age of 33, those words mean so much more to me. I mean on this very day. Just now, after having a major problem show its ugly little head at work which will throw me completely off schedule for the rest of the month probably, I realized how blessed I am in life. Its so weird when things like that hit you. I was pretty pissed off and went to my “therapist” Cathy who sits down the row to complain in her cube. When I got back to my desk I smiled and just felt a wave of gratitude wash over me and all of a sudden I just wasn’t really as worried about this problem anymore. My life is pretty good.I’ve had a good childhood. My parents had their domestic issues which affected me more than I realized but my relationship with each growing up was wonderful. I had my share of problems in college, being one of those nightmare daughters who got pregnant sophomore year at the age of 19 – but today my daughter is the single greatest thing that I have ever or feel I will ever accomplish. In life. Period. Relationship issues- lets not even go there, but at the end of the day I can say wholeheartedly that I am loved. Despite a lot of things, I know that. I don’t surround myself with a lot of people, but the friends I have, the few who get me and understand me and truly truly deep down accept Lesley for who she is and nothing more- I am truly grateful and blessed because I can tell you, Lesley is not the easiest person to know or love and the people who have opened their hearts to that will always be there and I’m grateful for them. I have a great job that I complain about, but looking at some of the choices that I’ve made in the past, its a wonder that I’m even here right now. I have a comfortable home which I pray daily will remain as peaceful as its been since I moved. I have a lot to be thankful for. When I look at the list of things I need, I feel that I have everything I need and a means to get most of what I want. My daughter and I are finally able to remember my mother and laugh and really treasure the good times, as we did Saturday night when cooking dinner for a houseful of hungry boys. Life is good. Life is REALLY good and I feel bad that I have spent so much time not really appreciating the things and the people that I have been blessed with. I feel bad thinking of all the times I felt I needed to be doing something else, or the times I felt I needed to be somplace else in order to REALLY be happy. I think I spent a lot of times waiting for something to “start”. From where I’m sitting today, I can honestly say that whatever it is that was supposed to “start” in order for me to really appreciate Lesley’s life, actually started 33 years ago and I don’t really have a second to lose in celebrating that.


litmus for lovers


On a single sheet of notebook paper, draw a line down the center. On the right hand side of the paper, write down what you do in a single day for your mate or your household. On the left hand side, write down what your partner does for you. If you can’t think of anything, fold the paper up and return to it tomorrow. When you are done, compare the lists. Is there a balance? Take into account some things might be weighted so if one side is shorter, keep in mind the TYPES of things being done. If your mate is cooperative, have him or her write down what they see you doing on a daily basisfor the relationship while you do the same. When you’re done, compare lists. Are either of you upset by what the other has ( or hasn’t) written?

Based on the list alone, can you see which person is more valued in your household? Does it matter?

life path number

copped this from monnie, who copped this from diva:

Your Life Path Number is 4

Your purpose in life is to build your vision.You are practical and responsible. You work hard, knowing that there are no shortcuts in life.
You work for a better life for yourself and those you love, but you are not an idealist.
Trustworthy and honest, you also demonstrate great courage. People can count on you.

In love, you are a loyal and committed partner. You are the ideal spouse.

You don’t give up easily, and sometimes you can be too stubborn and unwilling to change.
You also can be too conservative at times. You sometime miss out on good opportunities.
Also remember that not everyone can work as hard as you, as disappointing as that is!

What Is Your Life Path Number?