do overs, comcast sucks, the pink eye, angel wife and more

Ever had one of those days where you felt that if you could JUST start over from the beginning, that all would be well in the world? You get about half way through days like this and give  up because if things continue to progress in the same manner, really, what would be the point of putting forth any effort. SIGH. THIS HAS BEEN MY WHOLE ENTIRE WEEK.  Jesus take the wheel, the keys,the car……heck,drop me off somewhere and please please please pick me up later when order has been restored. I got a call on Monday night telling me that my godfather would be getting buried the NEXT day. Who waits til the day BEFORE a funeral …HOURS even to pass off this kind of information?? My godfather had been ill for the past 20 odd years. Several strokes had rendered him paralyzed, and added to that problems with diabetes, kidney failure…he’s been holding on with the help of a DEVOTED ANGEL WIFE for all this time. She passed last year and he finally crossed over last week. Now, this man had about 9 children, but guess who’s photo he kept in his wallet all these years? Yup, everytime I saw him, he would show me my busted high school photo- the only pic other than his wife- that he kept there. So of course, as late of notice that I got, there was no way in three hells I was tryin to NOT be there. I made some calls to have some folks cover me at the office the next day. I got to the funeral a tad bit late, it was one of the more “interesting” services that  I have EVER EVER EVER been to, and all that I can respectfuly say is that my strong strong desire to be cremated with a small memorial service were just reinforced. One hundred times over.

Moving on.

So of course the day after the funeral-Wednesday-, I had two hundred fifty emails in my inbox at work. Voicemail on my office phone and work cell phone-full. This is where the giving up part comes in because..whats the point. Ifigured I’d go home, get into some comfy clothes and fall asleep on the couch watching cable. WRONG! WRONG! The cable was OUT. Cable, internet AND PHONE- DOA. Of course, calling Comcast won us the privilige of waiting on hold for ONE HOUR AND THIRTY MINUTES. Maybe thats a little misleading to say because it gives the impression that someone picked up after one hour and thirty minutes. No. After one hour and thirty minutes of some damn elevator music featuring a stupid cheerful flautist, we gave up.Cause really, what would be the point.

flute.jpg (Side note.Whoever is responsible for choosing the “hold” music at Comast- I hate you. Dont play some cheerful azz music that brings forth images of butterlies flitting and brooks burbling!! Don’t you know that if your local office wasn’t closed that da*n flute alone would’ve had me in my car on my way there to act a fool!!! With all the foolishness that your customer’s endure- you should be playing something more morose…like a da*n bassoon… )) 

 The next day we were promised a visit out from the tech. Meanwhile, I had awaken to a nicely crusted film over my right eye. Since I had no internet and had some things that I HAD TO GET DONE- I got in my truck with my one good eye and trekked out to Ashburn, where I was treated like a leper as “girl don’t you know you got the pink eye!?” AARRRGGGHHH. I stayed at work for about three hours and then headed home quickly to wait for the tech who did show up at 5:30pm. Apparently, our lovely WMZQ fans next door ran into the cable line or something with their truck and “we tried to tell you we knocked on the door but noone answered”. Maybe the should have tried adveritising it on WMZQ on a commerical break at 4 in the morning. “This just in. Would the people who live at **** please contact your cable provider. I think we fuqed your situation up..just fyi”..yea that would have gotten our attention because hell- we would have already been awake. Buttholes. 

So right now, I am sitting here mapquesting the urgent care center near me to get some drops or something for this infectious eye situation I have going on. Don’t even ask about Valentine’s Day. LOL. I did get a very nice surprise in the mail, but I won’t talk about that because with the week I’ve had I haven’t even had a chance to thank the sender yet, but it did generate a smile in the midst of mayhem. I don’t have a ton of friends, but the ones I have are keepers.

Through all the madness- I am lucky to be alive and lucky to have a new week to look forward to ( hopefully) for another shot at doing it right. Hope your week went well. 

No food for 8 days…

So I’m day 8 of this fast. I feel GREAT. My energy levels are throught the roof, and on top of that I’m not hungry. I defies all logic I tell you because I am soo in love with food. I’m starting to think I must be raiding the refrigerator in my sleep or something, because its just that hard for me to believe that I haven’t really been hungry yet. I’m lucky in that I’ve not lost too much weight. When I come off this, I am going to adopt a healthier way of eating and I’d rather the weight come off that way. I had lost a little weight a bit back and gained that back, so for the most part, all I’ve lost is the few pounds I gained before and some change.  Good times indeed.

So. For the past couple days, I’ve been trying to think about the changes that I’ll make in my diet beginning soon after this fast. There are so many different diets, and fads that honestly, I’ve needed this time to reprogram myself when it comes to what my body needs to fuel itself. (See, isn’t that cool that I’m thinking of food on those terms?I thought so too.) But having done so many diets before where I can’t eat meat, or where I can only eat a combination of three foods, or where I have to drink two shakes followed by a sensible meal, it saddens me to say that I had forgotten how to eat. I forgot whats good for me. I tell people that I’ve been on a diet for the past 5 years. When they see me, they find it hard to believe, but dieting for me has become just a way to not gain weight. I haven’t really been able to lose.

So I won’t diet. What’s funny, is that when I’ve been thinking of the changes that I’m going to make, the first thing that I’m considering is the health factor. I just want to eat healthy. I want to give my body the respect it deserves and be healthy. This is a first for me. In the past in order to lost 40lbs in 3 months, I was quite willing ( and eager) to eat bacon and cheese and steaks and eggs in order to make that happen. Achieving good health was not even a consideration. I got the weight off but was I healthy. Nah, bruh. I seriously doubt that.

So, in a couple days I’ll start this journey. I have proven to myself that I have the discipline to make the necessary changes. I’ll just have to see if I can maintain that same resolve to move toward a better me.

We shall see.

surprised

So I’m on day two of this fast. So far so good. I’m worried about making it through to the end of the fast though. As of right now I’m not hungry, but I’m sure I will be singing a different tune come Tuesday. Its just that I hadn’t realized how much time I spend in a day thinking about food. It is so bizarre. When it is time for meals, I find myself missing the act of eating, but the lemonade SO FAR has kept me feeling satisfied. I LOVE food so I don’t anticipate this feeling lasting much longer. When I have thought about food, I’ve tried to reevaluate the types of things that I’ve been putting into my body thus far. I’ve read other blogs of those who’ve done this fast before me, and many of them always looked forward to the end so that they could indulge in their favorite fast foods. One had a Snickers bar in her freezer for the day that she could indulge in solid foods. I am praying, praying, praying that I am able to keep my eating clean so that I don’t feel the need to do something so drastic anymore. “He” is in a constant quest for being healthy so I figure that we can treat ourselves once a week or so with a nice indulgent meal, but for the most part I’m hoping that we can keep it clean and stay healthy. But then, its only day two and I haven’t felt the true pangs of hunger yet.

By Tuesday, I could be sitting at this keyboard, with the remnants of a vat of fries on my greasy fingers, telling you all how I tried to be as strong as I could, but the food was just calling me man, it was calling me.

Sigh.

I guess I’ll take it one day at a time and see how it goes.

((O I’m watching the original King King right now. I’ve never seen it before and I’m just basking in the utter cheese of it all. Just love black and white movies!!)

Master Cleanser

i’m going to start this cleanser today. since i’m not “regular” i often have to rely on colonics and other methods to ….errum..eliminate. (Seriously, if I told you how often that happens, you’d be scared..shi…well you know where I’m going with that) Even when I eat clean, I still have problems in that area, so I’m convinced that I need to start from square one. I think I’ve done a lot of damage to my body and I want to sacrifice TEN days to begin repairing it.

So.

To transition into a serious life change I’m going to practice some good ole fashioned discipline and clean my body. What I hope to achieve with this is evidence that my system is being cleansed, improvements to my skin, enough weight loss to inspire me to change my way of thinking when it comes to food, so that I’m not dieting any longer, but just making better choices innately. I’m going to also use this time to get my mind right. To get in touch with myself spiritually. I know this is highly unorthodox and that lots of folks are totally against this type of thing, but I know myself and my body needs this.

Send your positive thoughts my way. I’m sure gonna need them.

Take care.