On a single sheet of notebook paper, draw a line down the center. On the right hand side of the paper, write down what you do in a single day for your mate or your household. On the left hand side, write down what your partner does for you. If you can’t think of anything, fold the paper up and return to it tomorrow. When you are done, compare the lists. Is there a balance? Take into account some things might be weighted so if one side is shorter, keep in mind the TYPES of things being done. If your mate is cooperative, have him or her write down what they see you doing on a daily basisfor the relationship while you do the same. When you’re done, compare lists. Are either of you upset by what the other has ( or hasn’t) written?
Based on the list alone, can you see which person is more valued in your household? Does it matter?