end times, sho nuff

This makes not a damn bit of sense.

This is wrong on every imagineable level there is. The quote on his myspace page is absolutely chilling.

Look.

God don’t like ugly

 

 ”Just wakin up in the mornin gotta thank God
I don’t know but today seems kinda odd”

so.

today was the first day that I got to work on time in a while. This despite the fact that I got home after midnight and didn’t fall asleep until 2. Drama has found me of late so I had a rought time sleeping but once I feel asleep, all was well in my world. That is until the cowboys next door  started in with the first of their twice weekly 4am serenades.Lucky for me, they’ve started shutting it off almost immediately so I was able to fall back asleep within minutes.

Anyway, I woke up at 6:30 and go about my morning routine to get washed and dressed for work.I eat my oatmeal,pack my lunch, grab my computer and I’m actually out the door by 7:30. Traffic-perfect. I must have caught every green light to the office. I get to work and the office is fairly empty so I crank up the Pandora, grab a cup of tea and write out my calendar for the day. I mean, the day was FLAWLESS. I finally got caught up. The phone wasn’t constantly ringing and when it did, I was able to wrap the calls up with minimal effort. I was chillin’ like Ice Cube for real. It was a good dang day. I was focused and on point for all my conference calls, patting myself on the back when at the end of the day I had finished everything on my calendar. I actually left the office before 6pm. I was looking forward to coming home, taking a hot bath and laying back.

But of course.

Things didn’t go as planned.

*sigh*

See, what had happened was last week a good friend of mine told me this story about an incident she had in the bathroom at work. It was the most traumatizing thing that could ever happen. When she told me the story I was rendered speechless for a moment. Seriously it was the most hilariously horrifying story I had ever heard. I didn’t know whether to bust out laughing or to try and be the supportive friend and tell her that it wasn’t that bad and could have happened to anyone. (Needless to say I laughed my azz off). Anyhoo today, after packing all my crap into the truck I get inside and my cell phone rings. I answer, making sure to switch it to speakerphone mode because dearlesley is nothing if not a cautious driver! On the other end,  C is on the phone to tell me of her traumatizing day. It would seem that October is prime time for bathroom issues in public places. In comparison to what I heard last week, her story was but a drop in the bucket. SO. To make her feel better, I decided to share L’s story.

Big mistake.

So as I’m telling the story, the memory of my friends HORRIFIC experience coupled with Cs reaction to the story had me laughing my azz off. Still cracking up, I put the truck into reverse and ever so gently pat the gas pedal so that I can back out of the parking spot.

Oh yea, when I laugh my eyes close.

I think it must’ve happened in a SPLIT second.

Seriously.

I thought I heard a little scrape sound but I wasn’t sure.

So, being the genius that I am, I pat the gas a little more. This time I’m certain I heard a scrape.

So I pull forward and then….wait. What is that folding back? I know I don’t have a spoiler on the front of my truck so what the…..wow.. Is that the fender?

Oh, I failed to mention I was parked between two columns. Yea. Forgot that important piece of information.

I was afraid to get out of the truck because I was pretty sure half my fender had been ripped off and was now lying on the ground behind me. Luckily, when I got out, I saw that the fender was still in place ( I guess its bendy) but the paint is scratched pretty bad on the  driver’s side front fender and the corner of the bumper.

And C is still on the speakerphone. Laughing. And that shit (of the literal and figurative sort) just wasn’t funny anymore.

What made it worse is that when I got back in my car,  one of my coworkers drives up behind me. Last year, I was leaving the office late (of course), talking on my cell ( of course), when she backed out of her spot like a bat out of hell straight into one of the cement columns. At the time I looked at her and mentioned the incident to my friend on the phone and said “damn, I know she saw that pole”. 

So today when I’m standing there using the good cuss words that I had actually put in storage ti’ spring, here she comes. I told her what happened, and she she shook her head and said they should really get rid of the columns because she too had had her “run ins with those poles”.

I know. (See, thats why this happened.)

So I called Geico and I’m to take the truck in on Friday. Of course they asked more questions about my building and the column than they did about the truck.

Does your company lease the building?

Is the column ok?

Whats the address of the building?

So, you said there was no damage to the column.

And the whole time I’m thinking, eff the column, I made my truck ugly!

I blame L for the whole debacle. If it wasn’t for her, I wouldn’t have been on the phone laughing, my eyes wouldn’t have shut, and I for damn sure wouldn’t have backed into the pole. Hate her.

Everyone knows you should do a courtesy flush.

blecch!

i feel pretty uninspired. since my move, i’ve been trying to come up with a look for my new place. initially, i had planned to get new living room furniture and new dining room furniture. i lucked out with kids furniture what with pier one kids going out of business. (twin sized beds for $39 a piece!). My old bedroom furniture will do as well for now. But I REALLY want to make a statement for the common areas of the house. I have seen a lot of pieces that interest me, but then I come home and crash on my comfy couch and worry that while  I might get somethign that LOOKS nice,  it  won’t welcome me home after a hard day’s work the way my current couch does. I was hellbent on leather too for a while, but he complained enough aboout how “hot” it gets ( huh?) and considering he’s gonna be investing in this too, I guess I need to be open to other options. Needless to say, as much as i want a new couch I’m REALLY on the fence about that particular piece. K also is partial to the chair and a half that we currently have. She feels its properly broken in and she can’t imagine another piece of furniture just feeling as “right” as this does. WHAT TO DO! I’ve contemplated just getting the upholstery cleaned really good and getting some nice throw pillows and calling it a day. Then I get stressed because as I haven’t started with any accessories or side furniture- how could I possibly know what color pillows to get? Or rug? ARRGGGH!  While I go back and forth over the sofa dilemna I know i DEFINITELY want a new dining room set. Or shall I say A dining room set. Right now what I have would be considered a dinette. Its a glass round table that seats 4. So much for entertaining. I’m partial to wood dining room sets and I’m really perturbed that Storehouse is out of business as I saw a set there a few years back that would be perfect here.  Once again, I am the victim of my own procrastination.

So thats my mission.

If I can get a nice dining room table, some nice wall art, a nice rug and a few accessories I should be all set. Oh yea, and maybe a bookshelf of some sort. Oops, forgot I’ll need a buffet as well. And maybe some lamps. ARRRGGGHHH. I really would like to get the place laid out the way I want before the holidays. I have two weeks to decide what I’m going to do. If anyone knows of any furniture stores with good quality furniture at reasonable prices, send links to a dining room table if you would. I am loathe to part with this living room set as much as I love the concept of starting fresh. I guess I can make everything else look so good that you’d hardly notice how …ahem, “gently used” the living room furniture is.

*sigh*

**the pic is something i was almost considering from Crate & Barrel.

Mad Men

last night, I stayed up until two in the morning watching an entire season’s worth of MAD MEN on AMC. I remember seeing previews of it long before ( yes, I am addicted to the AMC channel. I like old movies, what can I say?!) and my interest was piqued if only for the fact that they used an Amy Winehouse track in the trailers. This was a while back and I had honestly forgotten about it, but here I was on a rainy Friday night, curled up on the couch in pjs with the remote at the ready. I saw the full seasonon the menu and decided to give it a go.   The plotline basically follows a bunch of competitive ad men in New York in the early 60s. What I found most interesting was the behavior of damn near everyone in the office. All the main guys are married and of course all of them are sleeping with secretaries, models hired for ad campaigns, phone operators..just about anyone who comes through the doors.  All the women on the show look so prim and proper with their ladylike skirts and blouses and they all fit the stereotype of women of that era I suppose in that their sole purpose in finding work was to find a husband. (Once they realized that all the men in the office are married, they, I guess like a certain sort of woman, learn to settle with being the woman on the side)Of course, my potential ADD raddled brain got distracted trying to keep track of the amount of cigarettes smoked on this show. Mein Gott!  People were just smoking for no damn reason at all. Can’t sleep at night? Roll over and have a smoke. Kids sitting at the table having dinner. Sit with them and smoke. One lady had just had a kid, breasts leaking milk even and she’s lighting up! We get it we get it EVERYONE SMOKED BACK THEN!!! Aside from that distracting aspect of the show, overall its pretty good. Too bad for them they aren’t picked up by a major network.  I haven’t heard anyone talking about it and despite a few small problems, its definitely worth watching..

rain

I have ONE obligation this weekend, having promised a friend to attend an event with them but after that I am praying that it rains the entire weekend. I am so looking forward to sitting in the house doing NOTHING NOTHING NOTHING at all.

grateful

 

when i was younger, my cousins and I used to sing this song at my grandfather’s church called “be grateful”.  The words basically affirmed that God doesn’t promise to give us “happy” moments all the time. We won’t always have sunshine, or laughter in our lives. The concept of life itself pretty much guarantees a little pain and sorrow once in a while. Learning to be grateful first of all for the gift of life, and then being appreciative of the things that we have been given is the prescription for getting through the tough times. Of course back when we sang the song, it was pretty much because we knew we’d HAVE to sing something and that just happened to be one of the in our little group’s repertoire. At the wizened old age of 33, those words mean so much more to me. I mean on this very day. Just now, after having a major problem show its ugly little head at work which will throw me completely off schedule for the rest of the month probably, I realized how blessed I am in life. Its so weird when things like that hit you. I was pretty pissed off and went to my “therapist” Cathy who sits down the row to complain in her cube. When I got back to my desk I smiled and just felt a wave of gratitude wash over me and all of a sudden I just wasn’t really as worried about this problem anymore. My life is pretty good.I’ve had a good childhood. My parents had their domestic issues which affected me more than I realized but my relationship with each growing up was wonderful. I had my share of problems in college, being one of those nightmare daughters who got pregnant sophomore year at the age of 19 – but today my daughter is the single greatest thing that I have ever or feel I will ever accomplish. In life. Period. Relationship issues- lets not even go there, but at the end of the day I can say wholeheartedly that I am loved. Despite a lot of things, I know that. I don’t surround myself with a lot of people, but the friends I have, the few who get me and understand me and truly truly deep down accept Lesley for who she is and nothing more- I am truly grateful and blessed because I can tell you, Lesley is not the easiest person to know or love and the people who have opened their hearts to that will always be there and I’m grateful for them. I have a great job that I complain about, but looking at some of the choices that I’ve made in the past, its a wonder that I’m even here right now. I have a comfortable home which I pray daily will remain as peaceful as its been since I moved. I have a lot to be thankful for. When I look at the list of things I need, I feel that I have everything I need and a means to get most of what I want. My daughter and I are finally able to remember my mother and laugh and really treasure the good times, as we did Saturday night when cooking dinner for a houseful of hungry boys. Life is good. Life is REALLY good and I feel bad that I have spent so much time not really appreciating the things and the people that I have been blessed with. I feel bad thinking of all the times I felt I needed to be doing something else, or the times I felt I needed to be somplace else in order to REALLY be happy. I think I spent a lot of times waiting for something to “start”. From where I’m sitting today, I can honestly say that whatever it is that was supposed to “start” in order for me to really appreciate Lesley’s life, actually started 33 years ago and I don’t really have a second to lose in celebrating that.

JUST BE GRATEFUL.

some like it hot

the starbucks near my new crib is…interesting to say the least. Most of the staff seem to have recently graduated from an ESL course at the nearest NoVa campus. Not that there is anything wrong with that, but the language barriers caused some interesting mishaps with the early morning Sunday crowd. After ordering my coffee and standing in line, I watched no less than five orders get completely screwed up. If a “tall skim sugar free mocha” was ordered, a grande vanilla latte was placed on the counter. And no, they didn’t just get the customers mixed up. These fools straight made what they wanted to make and tried to convince folks that this was in fact what they ordered. The customers were so pissed off they just accepted the erroneous brew and huffed out the door, visions of a peaceful Sunday morning at the local coffee shop blown to hell.  One lady and her husband made the mistake of attempting to order four of the most complicated drinks I have ever heard of. I think they were even confusing themselves with their requests for things like “tall dry extra hot sugar free one splenda skim hazelnut latte” and another exactly the same but with TWO splendas instead of one. Crazy ish like that. The little husband growing frustrated with the cashier’s ” so one grande? hazelnut latte..?”  tucked his Washington Post under his arm, and stomped off, leaving his wife to remember what he’d ordered and deal with translating this information effectively to the cashier. Of course by the time their order was done, all four drinks were WRONG WRONG WRONG. The little agitated guy, having returned to the counter, yanked a cup out of the holder and demanded to know “Exactly what is this mess”. The barista looked at the letters written on the side of the cup. It looked like someone had written the entire alphabet down the side of the cup. By the time she’d gotten to the bottom, little guy’s face had turned about three shades of purple. I backed up because I was sure he was going to throw the entire cup of Caution:contents very hot across her cute but clueless face. They stood up there for five minutes and the sad thing is that when it was all said and done, one of the drinks was STILL wrong. The wife looked like she was about to have a nervous breakdown, because her DH had started taking his frustration out on her. They went over the drinks in the tray on the way out the door. I heard her ask ” Well who is this one for?”. His angry azz glared at her, and said ” who cares, its for the damn dog”. Without missing a beat, this heffa responded. ” But are you sure its what he likes?” LMAO. I’m sure he wanted to hit her. When I got out to my truck, I saw them sitting in an immaculate silver Range Rover. Before I pulled off, I saw the driver’s door and the passenger door open and cups of coffee were being dumped onto the ground. I drove off with my cup of coffee, smiling, remembering that keeping things simple always works best. At least for me. I really hope that couple was able to salvage their day, but somehow I’m thinking   not. As for the other patrons, that liquid crack is so good I guess it all tastes the same: just as long as they got their fix, they really didn’t care what the hell they were drinking. A literal hot mess indeed!

what the….

did he really need to be outed??

Dumbledore gay?

no seriously…who ARE you?

 

so today was one of those days that luckily went by rather quickly. I finally cleared off some old tasks that I had pushed way to the back of my to do list. Even though I got to work way late ( even for me), by 4:30 my inbox was empty and almost all my old dusty tasks were complete. Today was the first day in a long time I could look forward to leaving the office without my laptop and without having to bring work home with me. My friends, it was a good day. I took some time to go visit with a friend down the aisle and tried to enjoy the moment. By the time I arrived back to my desk after our chat, my AOL toolbar indicated that I had a new IM. I realized that I didn’t know the username. I wasn’t that alarmed as most folks in my company use AOL, and I do include my username as part of my company email signature. I was surprised to see ” I’m trying to realize where I know you from” when I clicked on this strange name though. I didn’t answer. I was asked what state I lived in. I immediately asked the person if they work for my company, and they responded that they didn’t. I asked for their name and they told me ( male) and then asked who I was. My response:”……”. He immediately replied back, “no seriously…who ARE you“. I became alarmed and told him that perhaps he had the wrong person, and he told me that I was on his recent buddies list for some reason. He asked again where I was from, wanting to know if I was from Ohio or MD. I told him neither.  I was intent on NOT providing a shred of data about myself. It just felt very uncomfortable to me. Why was this strange person insisting that I assuage HIS curiosity by sacrificing my peace of mind? NO, I do not know you and NO I do not wish to know you and please, just stop talking to me!! Thats my take on it. He could be the nicest guy ever in life, ever, but I just don’t want to talk to anyone without knowing HOW they found me, and WHY they found me and WHAT the hell they want to talk to me about. If someone found me through this blog, yes that would make sense. I’m sure  a convo would go something like this:

stranger who is NOT a stalker: Is this dearlesley?

dearlesley: yes. you are?

stranger who is not a stalker: O, I visit your site frequently..I just wanted to im and say hello.

 dearlesley: o ok. hey what’s up

stranger who is not a stalker: (would then start chatting about some non stalker like material)

dearlesley: ( would chat back, kindly removing her cursor from the BLOCK button, possibly making note of the username so that we could engage in future non stalker like discourse).

 How do you handle your personal security on line? With the number of personal blogs on the rise, the internet is chock full of very private and intimate details of our lives. For many of us, it is done under the veil of anonymity. Since we control what is being shared, we can also control with whom we provide this information. When you are emailed or IMed, at what point do you feel comfortable enough to actually engage in friendly discourse? At what point do you feel comfortable enough to share more personal information? I don’t know. It is a big step for me have blogs in the first place, and beyond that to have my picture attached is completely out of the stratosphere for a person like me. I am very conscious of WHAT I am sharing for this very fact. If I was confident that noone would EVER see my face or know who I was in “real” life, there is so much more that I could share. However since there is a possibility that I could be tapped on the shoulder in a moment of recognition in a public place, I really don’t feel that folks need to be THAT much up in through my business. Is that dishonest of me in a way? The things that I share are all me, and are all true. I guess I don’t always fill in the blanks.

Incidents such as what happened today, as innocent as I’m sure it was, send me reeling two step backs as far as my comfort level with this whole thing is concerned.

don’t drink the milk, its spoiled

 

“One might wonder if drinking milk is natural to human beings when we recognize that no other mammal on earth consumes the milk of another species or consumes it after a weaning period.”

Ew.

I’ve been thinking alot lately about making the move to soy milk.I’m becoming wary of the dairy industry at large, mainly becauseI’m questioning the health benefits more than anything. A lot of the articles that I’ve been able to find on the subject show that countries that have the highest levels of dairy consumption also have the highest levels of osteoporosis and other diseases that increased calcium is supposed to prevent. Countries like China who consume far less dairy than us, have a fraction of such issues. Lots of folks (mostly vegetarians but they have a point) attribute alot of  our maladies to too much animal protein in our diet: we’re consuming large amounts of meat as well as large amounts of dairy and its too much strain on our bodies. In order to for our bodies to get rid of some of this excess protein, we also actually lose calcium and other precious nutrients. Very interesting and I’m going to have to investigate further.

It is interesting though that after a mother weans her baby off the breast, her milk “dries up” since the baby is able to gain its nutrients from other foods. Maybe it IS natures way of telling us that we don’t need milk.  Who knows. I tell myself that I will try to focus on getting calcium from leafy green veggies and other sources but then I remember how lazy I am and question my dedication to trying this. I want to definitely read more about this though. What I read so far has grossed me out a little, and considering how much I love milk and cheese, I can’t tell you how … well pissed off that makes me.

 Sure I know that most if not all of this comes from animal rights activists, some whom would rather hug a cow than say hello to a stranger in the street, but its intriguing nonetheless.